Too much for one person to handle but I'm trying my absolute best as if saying that isn't cliche at all but hey

September 18th, 2014. Thursday. In the midst of my first set of midterms. A giant shitstorm of various problems has just left. Fortunately the problems weren't really about me, but due to some circumstances, I managed to get myself involved. And fortunately, things seem to be dying down, so that'll do me some good as I study for the next few exams coming up.

I guess I'll try to start with other things before the big stuff.

I've still been hanging out with Jacob, Tyler, and the guys from suite 214 and the girls from suite 807 from Hinton James. Glad that they've stuck around.

I've been going to the gym. Lost a couple of pounds so far. I'm looking better and better everyday and it's been nice.

Been going to Ukulele practice the past few weeks. I've really enjoyed it, Met some cool people and hopefully I can establish myself better in their group.

Went to Gamefest last weekend, where a bunch of video game tournaments occurred. Me and Jacob played a Pokemon Showdown tournament. I managed to make the finals of an 18 man tourney, but lost to someone who topped the ladder at some point in time and who is really really good.

Honestly I'm trying to meet some new people. I thought my roommate and Ex 2 would be cool to hang with but after everything that has happened I don't see that as a possibility anymore. I guess I can elaborate on that now.

The problems come from my roommate and the two girls he's been sleeping with. Ex 1 is the freshman girl, Ex 2 is the junior transfer girl. Last Tuesday, I was finishing up my 5 page paper. I was only on page 3 and pretty stumped at this point. I also had a pre-lab to write before my Analytical Chemistry lab. Roommate hasn't been in the room all day. It's been about two weeks since I caught Ex 1 and my roommate together. Ex 2 somehow finds my twitter account, and tells me to text her as she tweets me her number. I thought that it must've been important, so I texted her. She went into the room. She starts to cry. She tells me that she had sex with my roommate, but she thinks that he doesn't really want to be friends with her anymore. This whole situation is making her panic. She wants to steal a shirt she bought for my roommate, hence her reason for coming. Knowing her history with depression, and the fact that she has attempted to kill herself before, I know I have to get involved before anything drastic happens today. I tell her about the other girl. As I predicted, she had no idea. In fact, my roommate told Ex 2 today that he has been taking a nap in the room that day, when in fact he hadn't been in the room all day because I was there and didn't see him come back. He's been lying to Ex 2 several times. And to top it all off, Ex 2 has been self-harming herself recently. My roommate knew all of this, the depression and the cutting. And when Ex 2 wanted to seek help, MY ROOMMATE SAID SHE DIDN'T NEED HELP AND THAT SHE'LL BE FINE. Ex 2 needs help. I have seen that first hand. Whatever medicine she's taking for depression wasn't helping. She needed to seek professional help. And I told her this over and over. Then my roommate came back. I had to go to my lab, so I left them alone. I made sure to not leave her alone until he came back. I was scared she'd harm herself. I go to my lab then to the library to finish up my paper. Roommate texts me saying that Ex 2 is in the ER and she's seeking help. He tells me how he acted like a scumbag. Which is true. But I'm glad she went to get help. 

All of this along with all the shit that I had to worry about with classes was not good on my stress levels. 

Anyway, now the past 2 days, roommate has acted strangely. He hasn't gone to class in these past 2 days. As I type this, he's packing several clothes into a bag. Like more than a weekend's worth I think. He packs various articles of clothing from T-shirts, to button down shirts, to a suit. I'm really confused. I'm not going to ask him either, because we haven't spoken to each other since the incident and everything is super awkward. 

So I was right. Shit blew up. 

Besides all that, I got a C in my bio exam. I'm not happy about that at all, so I'm going to go ham on some studying for Chemistry so I can at least get a grade that I'll be happy about. 

I saw Lauren at the library. She looked busy, but I had to ask her something. She knows Ex 1, and I wanted to know if she knew anything about her and my roommate. She doesn't know anything, but I do notice something. I didn't feel anything talking to her. No excitement. No happiness. No sadness. It was like talking to any random stranger. And honestly, I like this feeling. I no longer feel longing when I see her or now when I talk to her. No longing to be friends, no longing to be together again. Just nothing. If fate brings us together as anything, then it will. But it doesn't seem like it for now. And I'm happy. Happy that I feel even more free.

Lastly, no progress on with the girl in the dorm next to me. I've seen her walking with friends, and that just complicate things for me. So we'll see about that. Hopefully I can talk to her, and if anything, bring new friends into my life. I love my friends now, but I also would like a breath of fresh air.

That was so much stuff man. I hope next update is filled with more positive results. But things are looking up, and I hope everything turns out okay for everybody.